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It's real

Depression- the word is either used too much or not enough. 

Upon hearing that someone may be depressed, some just look the other way as if it's not real, as if it's a trend or not as bad as the guy next door. Some may treat it with medication, therapy, and may even suggest medidation. 

I heard a statistic from 2013, that 437 children die from cancer, that is one too many, and 4,600 individuals ages 10-24 will take their own lives. I am one hundred percent positive the numbers have increased since, sadly. So. Are we judging too quickly when some one may be depressed? Are we shrugging it off as if it's not a thing. Let me tell you something...

Unless you have mentally experienced the battles a depressed person fights- you have no say. Unless you have felt your own heart beat fasten it's pace because your lungs are trying to grasp for air due to heavy tear flow that became silent- you can not point fingers. Unless you felt the utter darkness that surrounds the mind and the …

I'm not proverbs thirty one

Have you ever read Proverbs 31? 

It describes a woman who is intimidating to me, yet I aspire to be. If you ever have time, read the chapter, if not, I'll break it down for you. In this chapter King Lemuel meaning "devoted to God" wrote a passage that was almost a perfect description of his mother, some say he was inspired by her wisdom. His mother, Bathsheba made her wisdom very evident when she was basically telling her son "not to fall into the trap of immorality, chasing after women will sap a king's strength. (Proverbs 31:3) I can only draw my own assumptions that Lemuel was inspired by that saying and wrote up a whole chapter based on what a woman of virtue should look like. I won't quote the chapter in this blog, although I must have read it three or four times tonight, and had it basically memorized at some point in high school, however I'll attempt to simplify with my such minuscule concoction of words.  

So, what is a Proverbs 31 woman? 
She is tr…

Jason Walker's Song

writer's block-
1. the condition of being unable to think of what to write or how to proceed with writing. 
so read between the lines of a song that's on repeat and won't let me sleep. 


I don't know where I'm at
I'm standing at the back
And I'm tired of waiting
Waiting here in line, hoping that I'll find what I've been chasing.

I shot for the sky
I'm stuck on the ground
So why do I try, I know I'm gonna fall down
I thought I could fly, so why did I drown?
Never know why it's coming down, down, down.

Not ready to let go
Cause then I'd never know
What I could be missing
But I'm missing way too much
So when do I give up what I've been wishing for.

I shot for the sky
I'm stuck on the ground
So why do I try, I know I'm gonna fall down
I thought I could fly, so why did I drown?
Never know why it's coming down, down, down.
Oh I am going down, down, down
I can't find another way around
And I don't want to hear the sound, of losing what I…

what is seen is temporary

the phrase I have tattooed on my forearm states "this too shall pass..." 

lately I'm realizing that the phrase holds multiple meanings. this. what is "this" is it eluding to? here's my faulty conclusion...

this. any state of emotion, life situations, adversities, joys, sadness, pains, tragedies...this will pass. so that leads to this- whatever joys we experience, they will soon pass, what ever pains we experience, they will also pass, the most painful "this too shall pass" includes the connections we make, the relationships we spend our time building, the people...they pass. They pass right out of our lives. You can look at someone and physically see them, all the while realizing the person they were before has "passed", the essence of their being was taken along with their "passing." 

"this too shall pass." 


As contradicting as it is, the permanent tattoo on my forearm indicates how temporary things are in this life. 

Upo…